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(theme song)
Scene opens in Mewni, three men play trumpets. Men and women surround a large table, and Manfred enters with a large plate.
Manfred Ladies and gentlemen of the Butterfly-Johansen Annual Picnic, lunch is served.
The Johansens cheer and roughhouse.
Johansen #1 Food!
Etheria [to Queen Butterfly] You know, Lord Wildrew is still single. Never too late to start over, dearie.
Queen Butterfly Yes, Aunt Etheria, I heard you the first hundred times.
Manfred May I present the first course?
Manfred lifts the cover off the plate, revealing Star. Everyone stares at her.
Star Check out this big girl sitting at the grown-up table!
Cut to the kids' table, where Star and Marco are sitting, along with six young children.
Star I'm too old to be sitting at this stupid kids' table.
Marco It's not stupid. We get all the Mewni corn we want. It's so good. [to one of the young Johansen children:] My man here knows what I'm talking about. Right, hungry buddy? [The child spits his food out onto Marco's face; groans]
Star I mean really? Sippy goblets.
One of the young Butterfly children plays with her food, getting some of it on Star's face. Star growls and holds up her wand, which glows green and makes zapping noises as it omits an electric charge.
Marco [as he forces Star to lower her wand] Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What's the big deal?
Star All the fun is happening over there!
At the grownup table, the Butterflys are being fed their food as the Johansens messily eat their own. The loud slurping noises annoy the Johansens, who abruptly stop eating. One Johansen groans through a mouthful of corn and stuffs corn into his ears to try and block out the noise.
Star [excitedly] Oh, it's starting to happen! [bites chair]
Marco What's starting to happen?
Star Grown-up stuff.
Back at the grownup table, the Butteflys (with the exception of Queen Butterfly) and their servants argue with the Johansens, everyone talking over one another.
Queen Butterfly There's no need for any of this, I just want e—
Etheria You Johansens spoiled my appetite like you spoiled the Butterfly family tree.
Queen Butterfly [over all the fighting] Oh here now, let's put a stop to this. Tut-tut.
King Butterfly Your neck ruffles are choking off the oxygen to your brain!
Queen Buttefly River!
King Butterfly You li— oh! [the arguing stops] Yes, of course, of course. [clears throat] Now, now. There's no need for all this back and forth about who's better than who. We're all royalty, as you know. There is a way we can settle this petty dispute like the civilized people we are. With [pulls out a blue flag; shouting] flags!
Everyone cheers in agreement, pulling out red and blue flags. Cut back to Star at the kids' table. She stands up on her chair and pulls out a pink flag unique from all the others.
Star Flags!
Cut back to the grownup table. Queen Butterfly face palms.
Queen Butterfly Oh, dear.
King Buttefly It's about time! [everyone cheers and marches away, forcing Queen Butterfly with them. King Butterfly, standing alone on the table, chases after them] I've been thinking about this all year! [laughs]
Star and the children at the kids' table excitedly watch as the adults go.
Star Come on, Marco. [grabs Marco by the arm and pulls him out of his seat] Let's play. All we have to do is be the first to get this flag up there.
Pans right to a large hill.
Marco Ooooooh. [cuts back to Marco and Star] Like King of the Hill! I rock at that game.
Star Not that hill.
Cut back to the hill and then pan out to reveal giant mountain filled with various, dangerous obstacles.
Star That hill.
Marco Oooooh.
Star And the winner gets to look down on everyone else for a whole year. I am so ready for this! [starts running and bumps into her mother]
Queen Buttefly [takes flag from Star] No way. [starts walking away, but stops when Star speaks]
Star Heeeey. That's my flag!
Queen Butterfly You can have it back after the match, but you won't be playing Flags today.
Star Why not? You played Flags when you were my age.
Queen Butterfly I did a lot of things you won't be doing.
Star [growls]
Queen Butterfly I know it's boring to be the oldest at the kids' table, but you're not ready to be the youngest at the adults' table.

Now go and help your little cousins chew their corn. [walks away]

Star I'll show her. I can play this game, and I will win. Come on, Marco. You're on Team Star.
Marco But you heard your mom. We're supposed to stay at the kids' table.
Star Don't you worry. [pulls out wand] We'll be sitting at the kids' table.
Cut to all the adults lining up at the starting line, cheering, and Manfred, who is sitting in a high chair to oversee everything.
Manfred The game will commence when all participants are at the ready.
Marco and Star poke their heads out between two family members' legs.
Marco So if both sides of your family are playing against each other. Whose side are we on?
Star Duh. Our side.
Manfred Here's to another spirited game of Flags. Uh, let us not have a repeat of last year's unfortunateness.
Marco What happened last year?
Star Just before he reached the peak, Uncle Lump got his body cut off.
Marco What?
Star Relax. He's fine. He's right over there.
Cut to Lump, whose head has been sewn onto a horse's body, and is holding a blue flag in his mouth.
Lump Neigh, neigh.
Cut back to Star and Marco.
Star I think he likes it better this way.
Manfred Ready, set, flags. [shot sounds and everyone runs off]
Star Here we go, Marco. Hyiah!
Manfred And both families are at the course. The Johansens take an early lead, but the Butterflies are making up the slack.
Cut to Queen Butterfly, who is sitting under a canopy, watching the game. Classical music plays. She turns around, pushes the curtain aside, and uses her opera glasses to look at the kids' table, where she sees the backs of what appear to be Star and Marco. She smiles.
Queen Butterfly [happily] That's my girl.
Back at the base of the mountain, both families cheer and begin to scale the mountain. On his way up, Marco starts to slip off of a rock.
Marco Star, little help.
Heartrude [holds out hand to help Marco up] Oh, here, my dear boy. Allow me to assist you.
Marco Hey, thanks.
Star Marco, no!
As soon as Marco grabs Heartrude's hand, his "hand" falls off, and a servant who was acting as his hand falls out of his sleeve. The servant and Marco fall, and Marco can be heard screaming on the way down.
Heartrude Oh! By my troth, you most surely ate it on that one. Smooch my royal hindquarters. [chuckles] Toodles!
Heartrude runs away, passing Star, who is running down the hill.
Star Nice takedown, Uncle Heartrude.
Cut to the bottom of the mountain. Marco is standing over the servant, who is laying down, refusing to let go of his hand.
Marco Ugh! Let go! [pries hand away]
Star You good?
Marco Why did you congratulate him? He pulled me down.
Star That's Flags. That's how you play. [grabs Marco by the hand and starts running] We gotta keep moving.
As the two scale the hill, they come across Heartrude, who is stuck in a bear trap.
Heartrude [to Star and Marco] Prithee, may I accept some assistance?
Marco Dream on, Uncle Jerkface!
Heartrude [once the two have left] Woe sakes. I have not the choice but to gnaw off my own fibula.
Cut back to Star and Marco, who are tailing the others.
Star We're going into the rain zone.
The sky is halved, one with normal weather and the other with rain. Thunder rumbles.
Marco Oh, no. I can do King of the Hill. I cannot do wet socks. [Star grabs him, forcing him into the rain zone]
Star Flags doesn't care what you like! [they jump over a body that comes rolling down] We gotta keep moving.
Further up the mountain, Etheria is leading. There are two Johansens behind her.
Johansen #2 Out of the way, old lady.
Etheria throws a handful of seeds which sprout into vines and drag the Johansens underground, leaving two flowers in their place as Marco and Star run by.
Marco Wait a minute.
Star Eyes on the prize, Marco.
Further up the hill is a Johansen. He holds up his flag, which gets struck by lightning, and plunges it into the ground, laughing as the electric shock tears a path in the ground, sending large rocks downhill.
Marco Star, we gotta go back!
Star We are never going back.
Star, Marco and a Johansen dodge large rocks as they try and scale the mountain. The Johansen is hit by a rock and falls downhill.
Marco I think your family's really trying to hurt each other!
Star Yeah. Isn't it awesome?
Lump's head comes rolling down the mountain.
Lump Not again, not again, not again! [rolls out of sight]
Cut to Manfred.
Manfred And there's the repeat of last year. Adieu, Uncle Lump.

Who shall take the hill? [as he speaks, it cuts back to the hill, where Star, Marco and others are trying to climb up a snowy path] I am beside myself with anticipation.

Johansen #3 [screams as he rolls downhill, but briefly stops screaming when he sees Star and Marco] Hi, Star!
Further up the hill, King Butterfly shouts as he jumps out of a pile of snow and uses his flag to fence Star, stopping when he realizes who it is.
King Butterfly Star. Look at my girl, all grown up and playing Flags. [hugs Star] You make me so proud.
Star Aw, Dad, you're so sweet. [hugs him back] Buuut— [picks him up and throws him downhill; Marco screams and ducks as King Butterfly flies over his head]
King Butterfly [as he rolls down the mountain] Great job, honey! [rolls out of sight]
Marco You just threw your—
King Butterfly [comes back into sight, still rolling down the mountain] You got me.
Marco You just threw your—
King Butterfly Keep on going! Woo hoo! Yeah! [rolls out of sight]
Marco You just threw your dad down a mountain!
Star Haven't you figured it out yet? You don't waste time on anybody. Keep up!
Cut back to Manfred.
Manfred And the herd of participants is being further culled. There is now only a handful vying for the top of the hill. So dreadfully exciting. [looks through opera glasses]

Lady Etheria and Lord Grunt lead the pack with a late appearance from [gasps] oh, my. The Princess Star Butterfly.

Queen Butterfly What?
Queen Butterfly gets up and walks over to the kids' table, where the crying of a young child can be heard. At the table are two piles of corn shaped to look like Marco and Star and dressed in wigs and their clothes. Queen Butterfly approaches from behind.
Queen Butterfly Star?
She grabs the fake Star's shoulder, and her eyes widen when it falls apart. One of the Butterfly children tears a piece of corn off from the fake Marco's face and bites into it. Queen Butterfly turns around and looks at the mountain.

Cut to the mountain. Marco climbs up a rock and looks to see Star jumping from rock to rock over a pit of lava, and Marco follows her. Star runs into Heartrude, who is still stuck in the bear trap and being carried by a servant.

Heartrude [angrily] You've been a stone in my poulaines for too long, my incorrigible little niece! You're about to abdicate the throne!
Heartrude tries to hit Star with his flags, but she dodges and trips the servant, who drops Heartrude and stumbles on the edge of the rock. Marco jumps, pushing the servant away from the lava and saving his life.
Marco [to himself] What is she doing?
Star Marco, come on!
Marco Star, this game is changing you. It's not about who versus who or rivalries or whatever. It's about winning no matter what. And that's just not you.
The sound of fighting. Star turns to see all of her relatives fighting one another.
Johansen #4 Eat this! [throws a bomb into a trapdoor, where a Butterfly is standing, and shuts the trap door]
A butterfly woman is dancing on the hands of two Johansens who are trying to grab their weapons. Etheria takes the tip off of her flag to reveal the tip has been sharpened into a shiv. Grunt pulls on his bear pelt, which animates into an actual, live bear.
Marco Let's just go back down the hill. [Star hesitates, and then runs uphill] Star?
Star steals all of the flags from her family and continues to run uphill.
Etheria [growls] She's got our flags! [everyone chaises after Star] Get her! Get. Our. Flags! [grabs onto Star's leg, tripping her, and reaches for her] Give me flag. Give it to me!
The entire family tackles Star. There is a blue beam of light that shines into the pile and everything turns purple as a pulsation comes from the pile and pushes everyone off of Star. Everyone but Star is levitated in air, confused. Star looks up to see what appears to be a giant insect. It is Queen Butterfly in an insect-like form, with large butterfly wings, antennas, six arms, and glowing eyes. She gives off a blue aura and beams of blue light spin around her.
Star Mom?
The blue aura disappears, the Queen's eyes stop glowing, and she descends. When she reaches the lands everyone else falls and lands on the ground.
Queen Butterfly Are you alright?
Star Oh, man, Mom, those are some sweet magic moves with your big old wings and stuff.
Queen Butterfly Star, you're never going to believe, but I just met your twin sister. [retracts her wings and extra arms] She was made out of corn. I don't even remember giving birth to her.

River, did I ever give birth to a corn baby?

King Butterfly, who is severely injured, appears.
King Butterfly No. I'm afraid we just have the one child, my dear.
Queen Butterfly Thank you, River.
King Butterfly Her name is Star.
Queen Butterfly [as she helps her husband lay back] Okay. Why don't you just lay back down? Thank you.

[to Star] You see what Flags does to your brain?

Star I'm sorry I tried to trick you with my corn twin. And maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not ready for Flags. But maybe the real problem is that Flags is dumb.
King Butterfly [crawls up from the ground and grabs Star by the arm; to Queen Butterfly] There she is! I found her. Star Butterfly. Our only child, my dear.
Queen Butterfly ...Okay.
King Butterfly Hungry! [runs off]
Star I was trying to bring all these flags to the top of the hill. Not so that I could win the hill for myself, but to claim the hill for all of us! [cheering]
King Butterfly Who wants fooooood?
Queen Butterfly That's the most adult thing I've heard all day. I misjudged you, Star. You earned a rightful seat at the grown-up table.
Star [hugs her mother] Hug!
Queen Butterfly Star, public displays of affection aren't a Butterfly virtue.

[briefly cuts to the Butterflys and Johansens for her next line; the Butterflys stare at the Johansens, who are all in a big group hug] The Johansens, on the other hand, are amazing at it. [proudly] You are the perfect blend of both sides of the family. I'm proud of you.

Star Thanks, Mom. [as Marco runs to the top of the hill, holding a makeshift flag, a stick that has his sweater tied to it] Only an idiot would wanna win this game.
Marco [plunges flag into the ground] Woo hoo-hoo-hoo! I'm the winna! King of the Hill! In yo face! [does victory dance] Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh!
ved Star vs. the Forces of Evil Episode Transcripts
Season 1
Star Comes to EarthParty With a PonyMatch MakerSchool SpiritMonster ArmThe Other Exchange StudentCheer up StarQuest BuyDiaz Family VacationBrittney's PartyMewbertyPixtopiaLobster ClawsSleep SpellsBlood Moon BallFortune CookiesFreeze DayRoyal PainSt. Olga's Reform School for Wayward PrincessesMewnipendance DayThe Banagic IncidentInterdimensional Field TripMarco Grows a BeardStorm the Castle
Season 2
My New Wand!Ludo in the WildMr. Candle CaresRed BeltStar on WheelsFetchStar vs. Echo CreekWand to WandStarstruckCamping TripStarsittingOn the JobGoblin DogsBy the BookGame of FlagsGirls' Day OutSleepoverGift of the CardFriendenemiesIs MysteryHungry LarrySpider With a Top HatInto the WandPizza ThingPage TurnerNaysayaBon Bon the Birthday ClownRaid the CaveTrickstarBabyRunning with ScissorsMathmagicThe Bounce LoungeCrystal ClearThe Hard WayHeinousAll Belts are OffCollateral DamageJust FriendsFace the MusicStarcrushed

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