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Episode begins on exterior shot of the Diaz Household.
Marco (v.o.) All right, Star...
Cut to interior – kitchen.
Marco Feast your eyes on this!
Marco reveals a plateful of hot, cheesy nachos.
Star (singing, v.o.) Marco's Super Awesome Nachos!
Star claps excitedly and picks up a nacho.
Star [gasps] Triangle food!
There's a knock at the door. Marco answers. No one's there. Camera pans left as Marco looks around. Camera pans back right, and Marco sees Pony Head.
Pony Head Yo, what up, home fries?
Marco [screams]
Marco falls over, spilling his nachos.
Star [gasps] Oh, my gosh!
As Star comes outside, she steps on Marco.
Marco [groans]
Star Flying Princess Pony Head!
Pony Head Oh, hello, "B-Fly"!
Star hugs Pony Head and giggles.
Pony Head Girl, we're going out tonight! Are you ready to make some ba-a-ad choices?
Star Let me just wake up Marco.
Marco lies on the ground, motionless and covered in nachos and cheese.
Pony Head Oh, that is not a dead person?
Marco Not... dead... [groans]
Star picks Marco up.
Star Pony Head, meet my best friend Marco Diaz.
Pony Head Your best friend?
Star Huh? Oh, no-no-no! On Earth! You're my best friend on Mewni. Marco, this is the pony I've been telling you about.
Pony Head [snorts] I hate your face. Plus you're ugly. [laughs] Just kidding. That's a joke. Tick-tock, girl. Let's paaartaaay!
Star Yeah, Marco! Let's paaartaaay!
Marco With her? Um, okay, well, I was gonna... But I... I was gonna...
Star gives a sad puppy-dog pout.
Marco I... Ugh. Alright.
Marco picks a nacho off his shirt and eats it.
Star My two besties are gonna be besties!
Pony Head Sweet! Let's go!
Pony Head reveals a pair of dimensional scissors in her mouth.
Star [gasps] Dimensional scissors?! Aah! Jealous!
Pony Head cuts open a portal.
Marco Wait, we're going to another dimen—
Star Come on!
Star pulls Marco through the portal.
Marco [yelps]
Pony Head goes halfway through the portal, looks around suspiciously, and follows Star and Marco. The portal closes. A second portal opens, and three men in masks emerge. The shortest of the three picks glitter off the ground and samples it.
Guard of St. Olga Glitter. She was here.
Cut to Star and Pony Head laughing as they fall from the sky. They land on a cloud. Marco falls and lands face-first on the hard floor.
Marco [groans] Huh?
Camera cuts to several groups of alien creatures around the club and robots DJ-ing.
Marco Where are we?
Camera zooms out to show the entire Bounce Lounge.
Star The Bounce Lounge. My favorite place to chill. Just stay away from the edge.
Marco Huh? [screams]
Camera zooms out to show the ground under the clouds – a cap-wearing skeleton is impaled by spikes. Marco flails as he nearly falls over the edge.
Marco [yelping]
Star pulls him away from the edge and toward a photo booth.
Star Marco! Photo booth, photo booth! Come on! [giggles]
Star shoves Pony Head and Marco into the booth. She pops up between them in the booth, and they take several photos. In the first photo, the three smile, and captions read "yay", "good times" and "Happy Besties!" In the second photo, Star sticks out her tongue, and captions read "Cheese!", "Get out of TOWN!", and "poot". In the third photo, Star makes a silly face as Marco laughs, and a caption reads "I♡friend♡". In the fourth photo, Star and Pony Head make duckfaces, and captions read "DUCKFACE" and "STYLEZ 4 MILEZ". In the fifth photo, all three make silly faces, and a caption reads "What's up?"
Star Whoo! Now... just you two! A souvenir from the night my besties became besties. Yay.
Star leaves the booth, and Pony Head glares at Marco.
Pony Head Listen. We are not gonna be besties. We are not even gonna be second-besties.
The booth takes a photo of Marco and Pony Head smiling, and a caption reads "Super Kawaii".
Marco "Second-besties"? That's not even a thing!
Pony Head Ohhhh! You wanna make this a thing?
The booth takes another photo of Marco and Pony Head smiling, and captions read "LETS ENJOY", "HAY GURL!", and "PARTY LIFE".
Pony Head Look here, Earth Turd. This night is really important to me. You mess that up, and you're gonna get the horn!
Pony Head points her unicorn horn at Marco's neck. The booth takes another photo of Marco and Pony Head, and captions read "WE ARE COOL!!" and "#1".
Pony Head Got it?! Good. Real good. Later!
Pony Head exits the booth, leaving a frightened and shuddering Marco. The booth takes a photo of Marco's frightened face, and a caption reads "OH NO SHE DINT!" Marco leaves the booth and sees Star and Pony Head on the dance floor.
Pony Head [whinnies]
Star [laughs]
Pony Head Whoo! Look at this! [whinnies]
Marco [whispering] Psst! Star, I need to talk to yooouuu!
Star takes Marco by the hands and spins around with him.
Star [laughing]
Marco Star, Pony Head threatened to—!
Pony Head shoves Marco aside, and he hangs over the edge of the cloud.
Marco [screams]
Skeleton Fall, fall, fall, fall...
Marco [whimpering]
Star pulls Marco back up.
Star Marco, be careful.
Marco Pony Head just tried to shove me off this cloud!
Star Ohhhh, noooo. She just gets a little wild when she dances.
Cut to Pony Head dancing with an elf-like teenager. She starts riding him like a horse.
Pony Head Oh, yes! Oh, you like that! You know you do! You love it!
Marco Well, she also threatened to skewer me in the photo booth!
Pony Head (o.s.) Whoo! Yes!
Star Yeah... She can be possessive. Pony Head! Let's go to the Amethyst Arcade. Marco will have more fun there.
Pony Head No! Way! Girl! I'm! Getting! My! Dance! On!
The three masked men appear through a portal, and Pony Head sees them.
Pony Head [gasps]
Pony Head quickly joins Star and Marco and opens a dimensional portal.
Pony Head Yes, you are right, Star. He will like the arcade better. Let's go!
Pony Head goes through the portal.
Star [sing-songy] She's warming up to you.
Star pushes Marco through the portal and follows him, plugging her nose as if about to dive into water. Scene transitions; Marco is wide-eyed and drooling.
Marco Holy pixels!
Camera zooms out to show the whole Amethyst Arcade.
Marco So many video games!
Pony Head Yes, I knew you would like it here. This place is full of squares.
Squares [groaning]
Star Look. Lance Lance Revolution. That's perfect! You guys, go play!
Marco and Pony Head [growling]
A 16-bit fighting game versus screen shows Pony Head and Marco.
Game Announcer Pony Head VS Earth Turd!
Marco Hey!
Game Announcer Round 1! Joust!
Marco and Pony Head fight on dance pads using small jousting lances.
Marco and Pony Head [grunting]
Pony Head You're going down, downer!
Marco Oh, yeah?! Well, your mother's a horse!
Pony Head Uh, okay, and your point would be?
Marco and Pony Head [grunting]
Star Aw, look at you two getting along.
Star puts her hands on Marco and Pony Head's backs, covering her hands in sweat.
Star Ewww. Oh! I'll go get us some nice cold icicles to put on your disgusting sweaty back.
A square plays a Whack-a-Mole!-like video game. The three masked men approach from behind.
Masked Man Hey, you. Square.
The shortest masked man holds up a photo.
Masked Man Have you seen this head?
Square #1 [confused grunt]
Masked Man Don't lie to me, little man.
Pony Head hears the masked man's voice, gasps, and drops her jousting lance. Marco wins the game.
Game Announcer You win!
Marco Hah! Who's the turd now?
Pony Head [flies off-screen] Still you!
Square #2 Uh, I think I'm next. But with less abusive trash talk, please.
Star waits in line at the icicle stand.
Square #3 Um, let's see. Do I want the pointy one or the pointier one? Oh, it's such a tough choice.
Pony Head [flies up to Star] Hey, Star, I'm bored. Uh, I know this other club, so let's bounce. Bleh!
Pony Head takes out her dimensional scissors.
Star Sounds cool. I'll go get Marco.
Pony Head Oh, no-no-no-no-no. He went on ahead. Um, yes, he wanted to save us a good spot in the mosh pit. Yes, that is the course of events.
Star Oh, classic Marco. Always putting friends first.
Star jumps through the portal, and Pony Head follows. Cut back to Lance Lance Revolution.
Game Announcer Finish him! You win!
Marco Hah! Did you see that, Star? Try and beat that, Pointy Head! ...Star? Pointy Head?
The three masked men surround Marco. One puts his hand on Marco's shoulder, and the shortest one breathes heavily. Cut to an underwater club called the Scum Bucket. Star and Pony Head laugh and crowd-surf.
Pony Head Is this not a blast or what, B-Fly?
Star Yeah-heah! But I don't see Marco anywhere.
Pony Head Pfft! You got me, girl. And I'm way more fun!
Star Uh, what are you talking about?
Pony Head Uh, heh, funny story. You're gonna love it. ...I kinda ditched him and left him in the other dimension. Oops. [chuckling]
Star What?! [screams, falls to the floor]
Pony Head B-Fly!
Star How could you do that to my best friend?!
Pony Head Best friend?! Last time I checked, the best friend was me!
Star I can have two best friends. Unless one of them is a friend-ditching liar.
Pony Head That Earth Turd means that much to you?
Star He's the best turd I've ever known.
Pony Head [sighs] Okay.
Cut back to the Amethyst Arcade. Marco is tied to a chair as the masked men shine a lamp in his face and interrogate him.
Masked Man For the last time... where is she?!
Marco [crying] I'm telling you! I don't know!
Masked Man Not talking, eh? What if I do... this?! [flickers lamp on and off]
Marco Stop! That's really annoying!
Star and Pony Head emerge from a portal.
Star There he is. [gasps] Crystal Dagger—!
Pony Head Wait, B-Fly! It's too dangerous, girl! ...Hold out your hand. Bleh!
Star holds out her hand, and Pony Head gives her the dimensional scissors.
Star Your dimensional scissors?
Pony Head I won't need 'em where I'm going.
Star But, Pony Head...!
The masked men surround Marco menacingly.
Pony Head (o.s.) Oh, hey, creeps!
The men turn to look at Pony Head.
Pony Head I heard you're looking to ride with a pony!
Close up on Pony Head's face.
Pony Head So come and get me!
Masked Men [growls]
Pony Head [whinnying and laughing]
The masked men chase Pony Head around the arcade.
Pony Head Whoo! Out of the way, squares!
Squares Aah!
Pony Head crashes through a group of square nerds. They fall to the floor in a Tetris-like sequence.
Squares Yay!
The masked men crash through the wall of nerds. Cut back to Marco who's trying to free himself from the ropes. He frees one of his arms.
Marco Hah!
Star Stand back, Marco!
Marco No! It's okay! My hand is free—!
Star Shiny Emerald Snake Strike!
Star turns the ropes into snakes.
Marco [spits] Bleh!
Star Marco, stop playing around!
Star pulls Marco along. The masked men continue to chase Pony Head.
Pony Head [whinnying and laughing]
Pony Head uses her unicorn horn to blast several arcade machines, making clouds of dust and scaring the square nerds.
Pony Head Whoo-hoo! I feel so alive! Whoa!
Pony Head nearly gets caught by the masked men. She blasts hanging stalactites with her magic, and they fall onto the masked men.
Masked Men Huh? [screams]
Pony Head [laughing]
Pony Head slams into a wall and falls to the ground. The masked men approach her. Star and Marco jump in front of Pony Head to protect her.
Star Back off, creeps!
Marco Don't worry, Pony Head! We've got your back! ...Of your head.
Pony Head smiles and gets ready to fight the masked men alongside Star and Marco.
King Pony Head [o.s., echoing] Time to give it up, cupcake.
Star Is that... King Pony Head?
King Pony Head appears from behind the masked men.
King Pony Head [deep whinnying]
Marco Uhhhh...
Pony Head Hello, Daddy.
King Pony Head Hello, princess.
Star [whispering] What is he doing here?
Pony Head Oh, B-Fly, it's the end of the line for me. But at least I got in one last night of fun with you, girl.
Star One last night? Before what?
Pony Head Before this! I'm going to St. O's!
Star [gasps] Not St. Olga's Reform School for Wayward Princesses?!
Thunder strikes. Cut to shot of Pony Head being sent to St. Olga's Reform School on a conveyor belt while screaming. Cut back to Star and Pony Head at the Amethyst Arcade.
Pony Head Oh, it's true. I did it to myself. I'm headed to the slammer.
King Pony Head It's reform school, cupcake, not jail. Although admittedly it is a lot like jail.
Star Oh, Pony Head! You knew you'd get sent to St. Olga's, but you still came back to save Marco.
Pony Head Oh, well, you know... It's hard to say it, but he is your other bestie. Okay, I said it.
Star Ohhhh... Come here!
Star hugs Pony Head.
Star and Pony Head Hugs!
Star pulls Marco into the hug.
Masked Man All right, princess. Time to go.
The masked men muzzle Pony Head and drag her away.
Star (o.s.) Bye, Pony! I'm gonna miss you!
Marco (o.s.) Hey, Pony Head?
Pony Head stops to look back at Marco.
Marco Good luck in princess jail.
Pony Head Aw. Thanks, Earth Tu— I mean, thank you, Marco. But don't worry about me! No jail can hold on to me for long! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Pony Head is dragged through the portal.
King Pony Head [sighs] Kids... You have 'em, and then you... wish they weren't around.
King Pony Head goes through the portal, and it closes behind him.
Star Yay! My besties are besties!
Marco Yeah... I wouldn't go that far. Hey! We're stuck in another dimension!
Star Oh, no, we're not. Bleh!
Star reveals Pony Head's dimensional scissors.
Marco Whoa!
Star Now we can go anywhere we want. Anywhere in the entire universe.
Marco I know just the place.
Cut to Marco and Star on Marco's couch watching TV and eating nachos.
ved Star vs. the Forces of Evil Episode Transcripts
Season 1
Star Comes to EarthParty With a PonyMatch MakerSchool SpiritMonster ArmThe Other Exchange StudentCheer up StarQuest BuyDiaz Family VacationBrittney's PartyMewbertyPixtopiaLobster ClawsSleep SpellsBlood Moon BallFortune CookiesFreeze DayRoyal PainSt. Olga's Reform School for Wayward PrincessesMewnipendance DayThe Banagic IncidentInterdimensional Field TripMarco Grows a BeardStorm the Castle
Season 2
My New Wand!Ludo in the WildMr. Candle CaresRed BeltStar on WheelsFetchStar vs. Echo CreekWand to WandStarstruckCamping TripStarsittingOn the JobGoblin DogsBy the BookGame of FlagsGirls' Day OutSleepoverGift of the CardFriendenemiesIs MysteryHungry LarrySpider With a Top HatInto the WandPizza ThingPage TurnerNaysayaBon Bon the Birthday ClownRaid the CaveTrickstarBabyRunning with ScissorsMathmagicThe Bounce LoungeCrystal ClearThe Hard WayHeinousAll Belts are OffCollateral DamageJust FriendsFace the MusicStarcrushed
Season 3
Return to MewniMoon the UndauntedBook Be GoneMarco and the KingPuddle DefenderKing LudoToffee

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